The Sex Temptation, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Mind

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating issue and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to obtain love, and males use love to get sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles interpret excellent sex as love. But those who fall under the Sex Trap go even further since for these songs, making love brings tremendous significance and consequences.

Singles fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they think sex is a essential test of compatibility, (if the sex is good then the relationship will ready too).

B.more frequently, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a dedicated couple as soon as they have sex.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical destination-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to keep in touch with truth when all those hormones are cutting loose. Our body reacts to somebody we are brought in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), which makes the opportunity to make love with someone we are drawn in to very tough to resist. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce emotions), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are involuntary and strong , causing powerful feelings of tourist attraction, excitement, nearness, over here love, and well-being .

When issues develop, those who fall into the Sex Trap often rationalize by believing, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is fantastic!" They most likely would not confess it, however they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their main searching tools are sexual destination and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach Discover More who works primarily with gay guys, says that a number of his clients have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men specifically in cosmopolitan locations, sex is readily available, and that in itself is a trap," North states. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical appearance, encourages sex. Lots of gay males desire to discover from the beginning if a potential partner is going to be sexually suitable. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to ready?".

Nevertheless, North includes, "I suspect this is a ' person' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do want to point out that chemistry is crucial. Yet, chemistry is a provided that we can't control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry occur, though in some cases it can grow gradually.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication wears away and truth hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to stabilize your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with good sense. While great sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying full focus on your vision, requirements, objectives, and values -- while feeling all those amazing stimulates!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

Comments on “The Sex Temptation, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Mind”

Leave a Reply

Gravatar